Best Funny Jokes - Latest Hindi English Jokes

Dear Friends, 🍀💚🍀                                                            ɪ mɪss You.                    ɪ ʟove You!                                            ɪ ʟɪke u                                                 ɪ tʀust u so mucʜ.                                "Aaj dost dost ka ʟovɪɴɢ daʏ ʜaɪ" ʏe messaɢe apɴe sweet dosto ko seɴd kaʀo mujʜe bhi kaʀɴa aɢaʀ dost samajtaʏ ʜo to!. Love u ----------------------------------------- ज़िन्दगी बहुत छोटी है... इसे किस...

❄ select one book  ... hum apki life ka raaz batayange.... black book golden book red book silver book white book green book pink book yellow book reply fast..... --------+++---------+++----------+++----------+++--------- Green book : Dil ki baat dil me rakhte ho, kisi ko batana pasand nahi karte ! Black book : Bohot romantic ho..Lekin Pyarki Talash Krte ho! White book  : Apni khushi se zyada dusro ki khushi ka khayal rakhte ho ! Yellow book  : Selfish ho just apne aap se pyar karte ho ! Golden book  : koi aap se bahut pyar karta hai! Silver book  : Simple living high thinking rakhte ho ! Pink book : Kisi ko bohot yaad karte ho ! Red book : Kisi se bohot pyar karte ho, apni jaan se bhi zyada ! its true must share it. Apna apna answer pad lo

We both left home at 18, You cleared JEE, I got recommended.  You got IIT, I got NDA. You persuaded you degree, I had the toughest training. Your day started at 7 and ended at 5, Mine started at 4 till 9 and Some nights also included. You had your convocation ceremony, I had my POP. Best company took you and Best package was awarded, I was ordered to join my paltan With 2 stars piped on my shoulders. You got a job, I got a way of life. Every eve you got to see your family, I just wished i got to see my parents soon.  You celebrated festivals with lights and music, I celebrated with my comrade in bunkers. We both married, Your wife got to see you everyday, My wife just wished i was Alive. You were sent to business trips, I was sent on line of control. We both returned, Both wives couldn't control their tears, but You wiped her but, I couldn't... You hugged her but, I couldn't. Because I was lying in the coffin, With medals on my chest and, ...

PASSWORD PROBLEMS:   WINDOWS:   Please enter your new. password. USER: cabbage   WINDOWS:   Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.   USER:   boiled cabbage     WINDOWS:   Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.     USER: 1 boiled cabbage   WINDOWS:   Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.   USER:  50bloodyboiledcabbages     WINDOWS:   Sorry, the password must contain at least one uppercase character.    USER: 50BLOODYboiledcabbages WINDOWS:   Sorry, the password cannot use more than one uppercase character consecutively. USER:   50BloodyBoiledCabbagesYouStupidIdiotGiveMeAccessNow! WINDOWS:   Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.   USER :  IWillHuntYouDown50BloodyBoiledCabbagesYouStupidIdiotGiveMeAccessNow   ...

The worst feelings in winters are as follows 1) nahane k waqt garam paani na milna 2) sote waqt koi chaddar cheen le 3) sote hue ko uthaane k liye thanda paani mu pe daalna 4) achaanak se breakup ho jaana 5) poori thand k season mein koi bhi bf/gf na milna 6) subah jaldi uthna Kasam se aakhir waalne toh rulaa hee diya 

Boy- Tumhari car kaisi chal rahi hai?  Girl - Theek chal rahi hai. Boy- Aaj sham ko dogi kya? Girl- Haan le lena, but ye to batao car ke bare mei kyu pooch rahe they???  😜😝😃😜😝

सेठ के घर इनकम टैक्स की रेड पड़ी-  सब कुछ देखने के बाद इनकम टैक्स अधिकारी बोला- सेठ जी सब कुछ ठीक है, लेकिन आप ने एक 'कुत्ता जलेबी' खाता बनाया है, जिसमे आपने 5 लाख रुपये से अधिक खर्च किये हैं। इसका ब्योरा देना होगा।  सेठ बोला- भाया मेरे पास तो कोई कागज पत्तर न है।  तब अधिकारी ने कहा- ठीक है, मामला रफा-दफा कर लेते हैं। आप 10 हजार दे दो।  सेठ ने मुनीम को आवाज देकर कहा- मुनीम जी, इनको रुपये दे दो और खाते में लिख देना की कुत्तों को 10 हजार की जलेबी और खिलाई।

boy: mom aaj khane me kya bnaya hai... mom: baigan ki sabji... boy: kya mom har bar baigan ki sabji... mom: ye sab najkhre apni bivi ke samne karna....tab to muh se ik shabad nhi niklega jo vo banaygi chup chap khaloge...!! boy:kkk lao  baigan hi khata hu...   after marriage.......... boy: aaj khane me kya banna hai darling.. wife: baigan ki sabzi..!! boy: kya??  baigan ki sabzi... wife: ye nakhre na apni maa k samne kiya karo tab to kuch ni bolte   ... boy:  acha lao baigan ki sabzi bechare ladke...😝

IThis is a good one..A Boss Asks his Employee: “Do you believe that there is Life After Death?”. Employee: “Certainly not, there’s no proof of it”. Boss: “Well, there is now. After you left early yesterday to go to your cousin’s funeral, he came here looking for you.” …

If u want to have some extra excitement during a roller coaster ride, carry few nuts n bolts wid u.. Let d coaster reach d max height.. Den tap d person infrnt of u n say "ye aapki seat se nikle hai"

Diwali is coming nearby All the whatsapp group admin should recieve an iPhone 6 or iPhone 6 plus from their group members thru contributuon because 1) sabse gandi dikhne waale ladki admin ki gf if admin is male and sabse ganda dikhne wala ladka admin ka bf if admin is female 2) occasion chahe jo bhi ho, party toh admin hee dega 3) galti chahe kisi ki bhi ho, differences sort out admin karega Last but not the least 4) koi bhi group chodne ki dhamki de, toh sorry bolke manana admin ka duty Itni saari takleefon ko jhelne k liye, admin ko bhi toh advance phone with latest technology chahiye taaki uska whatsapp kabhi slow na chale 

What will be the WhtsApp status of Sonam Kapoor's husband after their first night?? . . . . 'ना हाथ आया,ना मुह लगा'

The sun may light up the earth but my life is lit up by friends like you. Good morning. ----------------------------------------------- Good Morning, My Dear.. May You Wake Up Into A Beautiful Day With A Beautiful Smile, New Hopes And Joy In Abundance.. Have A Nice Day.. ----------------------------------------------- Every Morning I Thank Heavenly Father, for Loving me enough to Bless me with Answered Prayers and for Loving me enough to Protect me for unanswered prayers!!! GOOD MORNING ---------------------------------------------- You Feel The Soft Little Hands Lying On Your Skin. The Bubbling Sounds Of The Sweet Little Angels Has Filled Up Your Ears. What A Great Day To Start Ahead, Awaken By The Children. Have a Wonderful Morning!

New Diseases of Whatsapp users.....  1.Wrong post in wrong group syndrome 2.Non-reading earlier post dystrophy 3. Repeated posting neurosis 4. Late replying psychosis 5. Non-immune religionitis 6. Sudden disappearancitis.

एक बंदा अपने MICROMAX फ़ोन से गूगल पर  I PHONE 6 की कीमत सर्च कर रहा था ..... गूगल replied ----  भोसड़ी के अपनी ऒकात में रह ....

A Sick Leave letter from Pasha Bhai to his Manager Dear Manager Saheb Sending you this leave  letter  I will  not come  as my  eyes have come  '  if I come with  my  eyes coming  then  your eyes  will come  & you will not come  as  then  Still   if you  come with  your  coming  eyes all eyes  will come  & all  will not  come  . so  I will  not come   and all  will  come .  I  will come  back  when  my  coming eyes  will  go & all will  come  without their eyes coming Yours  Sincerely Pasaha Bhai na Jai Ambe... 

गब्बर के अड्डे पर... धिच्क्यु,धिच्क्यु.... गब्बर: ये भी बच गया! तेरा क्या होगा कालिया? कालिया: मुझे मत मारो सरदार , मैंने आपका नमक खाया है . गब्बर: सफ़ेद नमक या काला नमक ? कालिया: सफ़ेद. गब्बर: आयोडीन था क्या उसमे? कालिया: हाँ. गब्बर: दाना दाना एक समान? कालिया: जी हाँ... गब्बर: ISI मार्क है क्या? कालिया: हाँ. गब्बर: 'दूकान' से लिया या 'सुपर मार्केट' से या सरकारी डिपो से? कालिया: गावं वालों ने दिया सरदार. गब्बर: MRP देखा था क्या? कालिया: हाँ. गब्बर: एक्सपायरी डेट भी देखी थी क्या ? कालिया: हाँ सरदार.. गब्बर: टाटा था या निरमा ? कालिया: सरदार , मै नमक हराम हूँ... मुझे गोली मार दो.......।।।

हमारे ग्रुप एडमिन की दर्द भरी कहानी उसी की जुबानी- भोसड़ी वालों एक तो ग्रुप बनाया...  तुम सब को जोड़ा...  अपने बच्चों की तरह समझा...  कभी किसी मे भेदभाव नहीं किया... ग्रुप एडमिन होने के सारे फ़र्ज़ निभाता हूँ ... रोज़ नये नये जोक्स भेजता हूँ...  ज्ञान की बाते भेजता हूँ...  ब्लू फिल्म भेजता हूँ...  नंगी तस्वीरे भेजता हूँ...  तुम्हें मुट्ठ मारना सिखाया ... चोदना सिखाया... मुर्गे कुकड़ू कु बोले  उस से पहले तुम्हें Good Morning बोलता हूँ...  तुम अपना मोबाइल रिचार्ज करो या नहीं...  मे हर हर महीने 600 का 3g पैक करता हूँ...  सिर्फ तुम्हारे लिए ; लेकिन ... तुम लोग मेरी ही गांड मारने पर तुले हो...  हमारा एडमिन ये  हमारा एडमिन वो हमारा एडमिन ऐसा हमारा एडमिन वैसा हमारा एडमिन चुतिया हमारा एडमिन गांडु हमारा एडमिन लोड़ू  हमारा एडमिन लोडे जैेसा हमारा एडमिन फलाना ढिगङा लिखते रहते हो...  अरे ग्रुप ही तो बनाया है,  कोई पाप थोङे किया है...  और वो आजकल का फे...

Apna wallet nikalo aur usme se 1000 ke note nikalo. Gandhi ji ke photo ko dekh ke bolo "Happy Birdday, Bapu....",  woh note leke milo shaamko, Bapu ka birthday celebrate karenge......!

A girl was staring at me, I walked to her and said 'satyamev jayate' starting from 5th October. She gave me her number and said let's watch it together !!!